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Monday 11 May 2020

Ennui?

I have noticed that the writers of a number of the blogs that I follow have all recently mentioned that they have been suffering from a general feeling of lassitude. They have mentioned a gradual (or in some cases, quite sudden) lack of interest in the current wargame projects that are working on, coupled with a seeming inability to raise much enthusiasm for anything new. I know this feeling well, and have experienced myself. In fact, it is probably true to say that I have begun to notice the signs with regard to my current wargame projects.

There is a word for this feeling; it is ennui.

The dictionary defines ennui as being 'a feeling of listlessness and dissatisfaction arising from a lack of occupation or excitement', which certainly describes the way I am feeling.

The cause is not difficult to identify; it is the current lockdown, coupled with the recent spell of good weather. Who wants to sit indoors or potter around their garden (if they have one) for weeks on end, only going outside the confines of their living space to go to the shops to buy essential items or for daily exercise? In truth, no one wants to do that ... but we realise that if we are to stop the pandemic, we have to accept these limitations. We have been doing it for over six weeks, and after the initial feeling of 'Wow! I can get so much stuff done whilst the lockdown lasts!', our enthusiasm has waned quite a bit, and ennui has set in.

The good thing is that I know that this feeling will pass fairly quickly if I just go with the flow and don't try to fight it. I also know that I will then get my second wind, and my enthusiasm will return. Unlike the pandemic, where we are desperate to avoid a second wave of infection when the lockdown is eased, we are looking forward to our second wave of enthusiasm for all things wargaming. It will come ... but we've just got to be patient and wait for it to happen.

46 comments:

  1. Well put Bob and I have certainly been having that feeling of late. I managed to finally get a small game in this morning and that felt good. I'm just going with the flow at present and trying not to worry about my 'ennui' and know it will pass at some point.

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    1. Steve J.,

      Ennui is something that we all experience now and again, but I suspect that the lockdown has exacerbated it ... and about six or seven weeks in seems to have been most people’s exhaustion point.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  2. Hi Bob,
    Sometimes feeling a little flat with a lack of enthusiasm- comes and goes- not helped by the confinement of the Lockdown...hoping we can all see the end of it. At present between doctors visits I'm pretty worried- though I've been told many people survive Heart Surgury- however I worry. What I find is that building models or painting figures relaxes me and I tend to forget the ordeal I've been through. I hope to make some Martian vessels soon as things settle down. Best Wishes. KEV. (Sydney- Australia).

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    Replies
    1. Kev Robertson (Kev),

      I think that any illness - particularly if it has resulted in surgery - can knock the mental and physical stuffing out of anyone. I’m sure that you will feel better soon ... and in the meantime, your modelling will help keep your mind on things other than your recovery.

      I look forward to seeing your Martian vessels once they are finished.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
    2. Hi Bob,
      Thanks- as always I certainly do appreciate your words of wisdom. Cheers. KEV.

      Delete
    3. Kev Robertson (Kev),

      Cheers! It’s not so much wisdom but more like the distillation of seventy years of sometimes hard-leaned life lessons.

      Keep safe and keep well,

      Bob

      Delete
  3. Bob

    I think everyone's reaction will be different. I accept that most people will begin to suffer ennui, but I haven't begun to suffer it yet.

    The majority of my normal activities are precluded, but I'm lucky enough to live in an area where I can take daily outdoor exercise in a pleasant and relatively safe environment though there is some risk from manic joggers panting too close. I have also got through loads of domestic stuff with more saved for the winter.

    On the wargames front it is unprecedented opportunity to attack the lead mountain. That is a job that will last years.

    Richard

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    Replies
    1. Doctorphalanx (Richard),

      It does seem to be something that is affecting quite a few of my fellow wargamers, but I’m pleased to read that your aren’t one of them.

      We live in one of the leafier suburbs of London and have a largish garden, so we can get fresh air and exercise without too much trouble. We seem to have been inundated with dog walkers rather than joggers, and it’s not sweaty, panting runners that are the bane of our lives, it is the little ‘gifts’ the dogs tend to leave behind, and which their owners seem unwilling to deal with. (There is a £30 fine for allowing your dog to foul the footpath, but it is rarely enforced, especially at the moment.)

      I am currently renovating and rebasing my huge pile of model tanks and WW2 figures ... and that is a task that will probably take me years to do!

      All the best,

      Bob

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  4. A very good description Bob. For me and a lot of wargamers a key part of the hobby is the actual interaction with a live opponent. This lock-down has obviously stopped that especially as a fair number of wargamers fall into the at risk' category. Male, aged 55-70+, probably overweight and most likely having an existing medical condition. It comes from years of abuse whilst using banana oil and sniffing cheap glue.

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    Replies
    1. Independentwargamesgroup,

      Cheers! Although I am someone who does most of their wargaming solo, I do enjoy interacting with other wargamers. Luckily, blogging and using social media has helped to fill the gap.

      I am certainly a member of the group you’ve identified, although my existing medical condition isn’t a dangerous one ... although bananas rather than banana oil can set it off!

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  5. Well said, Bob. I think this mood is probably affecting the whole population, and we should probably be thankful if a little 'ennui' with our hobby is our only problem. I can still work, am safe and comfortable so far, and not having to look after children or vulnerable family members. I'm sure many are in a much worse situation, so I should be grateful. In the words of a certain former PM, 'keep b***ering on' seems the best thing, so let's keep blogging. A special mention especially to 'Tradgardmastare' for his fun daily posts..

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    1. David in Suffolk,

      Cheers! I think almost everyone is getting fed up with the lockdown, and unfortunately some people do not have the self-discipline necessary to set this aside for the general good.

      It sounds as if the structure imposed by the fact that you can work has helped you to avoid the onset of ennui. As a retiree, lockdown is rather like my normal life, but with some restrictions. As you say, WSC got it right; we just need to keep b*gg*ering on until the pandemic has passed.

      All the best,

      Bob

      PS. I totally agree about Tradgardmastare’s blog; his recent blog entries have been inspiring to read,

      Delete
  6. Just pushed through my last project (a small one), and had a hard time keeping up the effort (something I'll mention in my blog when I do update it). Noticed, as you mention, several bloggers mentioning a similar slump concurrent with my flagging energy. This might not be a marathon, but it surely isn't a sprint. I think we're all just hitting that point in the jog where we need to find a second wind, whatever that might mean to each, to carry through the next stage.

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    Replies
    1. Ed M,

      In the past, I’ve found having a couple of projects on the go at the same time has help me to avoid ennui, but this time it hasn’t, I think that you are right about the lockdown not being a sprint and being more like an endurance race. I’m just hoping that I’ll get my second wind soon. In the meantime, I’m helping my wife to do some Spring cleaning, and I’m finding the activity rather diverting and not a little satisfying!

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  7. Hi Bob. I don't know whether I am coming or going since I am so busy doing everything and nothing at the same time. I am in full lockdown (8 weeks for me) so I haven't been anywhere at all. I have a conveyer-belt stream of figures passing through the painting station and there is an endless stream of them in the pipeline. I continue to battle with the rats using poison, traps, sand and cement and slabs and that will take forever to complete. I, like you am 70+ so I don't have a limitless supply of energy to whistle through it all.

    I look forward to the day when the lockdown is lifted so that I can get a true measure of progress. Either that or I will have a nervous breakdown of sorts and cease to function. If I wasn't so busy I would despair.

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    Replies
    1. Jim Duncan,

      Because my wife and I are in the vulnerable age group but don’t have any underlying illnesses, we have been able to go out to buy food ... which is probably just as well as most of the supermarkets never seem to have delivery slots available when we’ve tried to use their home delivery service. (I understand from phone conversations with friends and relatives that some of the alternatives being delivered have not always been of much use. For example, a Jewish friend ordered lamb chops ... and pork ones were delivered despite him stating that he was Jewish, and my niece ordered some balloons for her one-year-old to play with ... and got birthday candles.)

      Your painting output has been quite prodigious ... but it sounds as if your rat problem is causing you quite a bit of heartache as well as work. I assume that they are nesting nearby (under your shed, perhaps?) and that exterminating them would present serious difficulties. Good luck with finding a solution.

      Having heard today’s statement in parliament, I think that your First Minister might have made the right decision about not easing things as much as they will be in England. I think that we should have stayed ‘as is’ for at least another three weeks to allow the R rate to drop much further.

      Stay safe and stay well,

      Bob

      Delete
    2. The rats may well have been nesting under the hut but nothing was obvious. The biggest sign of them was tunnels entrances along the edges of my patio. I lifted one or two of the loose slabs and found an extensive warren including more than one level. Thinking they were just mice at this point I feed them mouse poison which they readily accepted. I eventually saw one at night and it was certainly no mouse. I then blocked off the under hut void with a galvanised wire mesh, 17+10+17+10 feet so it took a while. They had reoccupied the tunnels so I decided to slab the whole area to deny them access underground. Then lockdown started. I eventually got a home delivery of slabs and then another delivery of sand and cement. I am working towards slabbing the entire area around the hut which will take a while. I now have rat traps with rat poison deployed but that may take a few weeks to get them all. I discovered a tunnel under my shared fence to my neighbours garden so that is next to be blocked off. Once I have all the defences and obstructions in place I will resume night time torch patrols to see if we still have a visiting population.

      While that has been happening I have also made considerable progress with my Sands of Sudan project and also my PW version. I hope to actually game with them soon.

      Delete
    3. Jim Duncan,

      You seem to have been waging war on your rats!

      We found several rat tunnels under our old shed (long since demolished) and blocked off all the entrances we could find. We mixed poison in with the earth we used, and for a time, the rats seemed to disappear. Some months later, one or two rats reappeared (and some of the tunnel mouths had been opened up), and this time I connected the garden hose up to our outside tap and filled the tunnels with water. The tunnels mouths were then replugged with concrete ... and we haven’t seen any rats In our garden again.

      Good luck with your efforts ... and with your Sands of the Sudan project,

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  8. Hi Bob,

    I haven’t felt ennui with my hobby time, however I have felt it with work recently. (I’ve been lucky enough to work from home). My boss said she was feeling it too. I felt more back to normal today and I have no idea why - unless it was having had the rare treat of a two-wargame weekend.

    Maybe when a hobby becomes too much like work (both in duration and the imperative to do it) the spark can fade.

    Hope you recover yours soon.

    Chris

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    Replies
    1. Nundanket (Chris),

      Working on your own can be draining, especially if you normally work in an environment where social interchange is an important part in the creative process. It’s interesting that both you and your boss have reached the same point at about the same time.

      I think that it’s important not to allow wargaming to become too all engrossing, otherwise it can intrude too much into normal life ... and it is that normality that provides the counterpoint to wargaming and enhances our appreciation of the hobby.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  9. Hi Bob,

    In a recent survey a respondent stated, "I feel so bloated and out of shape. I'm eating way too much junk food. There's nothing to do and nowhere to go. No one cares what I am or am not doing, nor do I care what anyone else is or is not doing. This must be what retirement is like." [The respondent is a 16-year old girl.]

    Um, thanks a lot, kid. I'm retired, and it's not THAT bad. But I must admit that like the others here, I too am feeling bored and unmotivated to do much of anything--even though it's not as if my daily routine is all that different now from what it had been prior to the last few months. Go figure.

    Best regards,

    Chris in Virginia

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    Replies
    1. Chris,

      That’s a pretty bleak picture of a young person’s life ... but not - I suspect - that unusual.

      I think that we are now seven weeks into our lockdown in the UK, and many of us are beginning to suffer from something akin to ‘cabin fever’ (‘lockdown fatigue’?) ... and I don’t think that matters have been helped by the media coverage.

      I used to be a bit of a news junky, and loved the 24-hour rolling news ... but now I hardly watch the news because it seems to be rather like the young woman’s diet ... constant ‘junk‘.

      The mainstream media in the UK seems to be obsessed with finding news stories that pick holes in what the government I’d trying to do, broadcasting opinion pieces as news rather than as comment, and trying to blame someone for every little thing that has gone wrong. I’ve even heard a broadcaster state that they are holding the government to account on behalf of the people ... something that the opposition parties are supposed to do.

      I’m not suggesting that we need a diet of propaganda - which would be just as bad - but a bit more information rather than opinion wrapped up as ‘fact’ would be nice. It might also help to break the ennui that seems to be so widespread.

      Keep safe and keep well,

      Bob

      Delete
    2. Chris and Bob
      I think that young person's bleak picture of "nobody cares what I do" is the perfect justification for having 'a pointless' (but satisfying) hobby that 'nobody else cares about'. So what? You can do whatever 'pointless' art, craft or hobby you want ... "nobody cares!" I see it as quite liberating.
      It works very well as a therapeutic focus for Models for Heroes https://modelsforheroes.org.uk

      Somebody please rush that teenage girl an Airfix starter set ... or a starter box of Orcs ... or something else pleasantly pointless.

      P.S. I avoided the obvious reply comment about being too unmotivated to read your blog post on Hobby "Ennui?"

      Delete
    3. Mark, Man of TIN,

      You’re right about having a hobby. It does help considerably.

      I know quite a few people I used to work with whose lives revolved around their work To the exclusion of almost everything else, and some of them used to make unkind comments about what they saw as my ‘silly’ hobby. Now that we are all retired, I still have something to get out of bed to do each day that isn’t just to sit and watch daytime TV!

      All the best,

      Bob

      PS. Thanks for the link to ‘Models for Heroes’ which I know has done some great work.

      Delete
  10. Working from home is really tough, and I just don't know where the day goes. However I find our weekly virtual gaming sessions very energising. Since lock down I've planned or run half a dozen games, built a new wargaming table and I'm on my third batch of toys to paint. I've also sorted out my rules shelves.

    It makes a change from a dozen video meetings a day...

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    Replies
    1. Martin Rapier,

      Funnily enough, I never found working from home difficult. I suspect it might have to do with the fact that as a teacher, I often had to work on my own. In a classroom setting, you may be with 30 other people, but before you go in you need to have properly prepared, and that was always a very solo operation.

      From what I have read online, you weekly gaming sessions seem to have been very successful, and that is exactly the sort of thing that will help you to avoid the perils of ennui.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  11. The last 10 years of quiet country living and solo gaming have paid off! Other than having my wife on hand more often since she temporarily closed her home dog grooming business. Luckily our nearest neighbours are about 1/2 a km away so we've gotten lots of puttering in the yard and garden done.

    When I include my gaming via video chat and on line scocialing, there has been barely any reduction in my social time but then while I've always enjoyed being social in small doses, I've also alway needed lots of time on my own. I sympathise with and understand (intellectually) how much many people are struggling but sometimes it feels like I've been training for this all my life.

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    Replies
    1. Ross Mac,

      I can see why the impact of the pandemic on your rural lifestyle has been a lot less than it has been those of us who live in urban areas. I suspect that Sue and I have coped better than people who are not retired or who spend their leisure time watching or taking part in sport.

      We both have hobbies that can take place indoors and on our own, but our close friends are golfers, and they are getting very twitchy because their golf course has been closed for nearly two months and they haven’t been able to play. They are watching lots of sport on TV to fill the void ... but recordings of matches that took place years ago is a poor substitute.

      Keep safe and keep well,

      Bob

      Delete
  12. Totally agree mate!
    Also my hands seem to have turned a funny shade of "sea blue" from my last lockdown project ;)

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    Replies
    1. Geordie an Exile FoG,

      I’ve been following your naval project with great interest, and have been impressed by your prodigious output.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
    2. The master plan is to play Victory Games "Tokyo Express" with models and perhaps "Carrier" for that matter .. watch this space IJN next ;)

      PS: They are small enough not to be too taxing to paint .. good work with the 20mm stuff Bob keep it up :)

      Delete
    3. Geordie an Exiled FoG,

      It sounds as if you have an interesting project underway.

      I look forward to seeing how your IJN turns out.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
    4. Cheers Bob
      I should have said both games (Tokoyo Express and Carrier) are solo games

      I am involved in another Midway ePBM style which is good but is irregular in the timings of play .. at least in solo mode you are your own master

      Delete
    5. Geordie an Exiled FoG,

      I seem to remember that quite a few of those boxed naval war games had solo options.

      It’s very important that the umpire keeps the tempo of moves ticking over regularly when they are running a ePBM game, otherwise players can get bored very quickly and the whole thing folds.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  13. Bob, This lock down has it's challenges, like the 16 y.o. girl I am eating to much but fortunately our eldest son, a personal trainer and who is normally overseas is living with us so the wife and I are getting our PT session, thus preventing weight gain (at least so far). I'm working from home 5 days a week but have found it more relaxing than the office as I can pace myself and do the research that is so often rushed or even forgotten. Although the volume of work has decreased the quality has increased. On the plus side I got to resurrect my blog. Stay safe Greg

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    Replies
    1. Delta Coy (Greg),

      Funnily enough, I’ve actually lost weight during the lockdown, but haven’t been following a fitness regime ... I’ve just been eating better and not snacking!

      I also used to find working from home more productive than working in an office. I suspect that it was mainly due to the lack of interruptions and the fact that I could concentrate much easier.

      All the best,

      Bob

      PS. It’s good that you are blogging again.

      Delete
  14. Bob,
    A moronic, totally unnecessary wisecrack:

    Bore me once, shame on thee.
    Bore me twice, shame ennui.

    Hey, I gotta million of 'em.

    Chris

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    Replies
    1. Chris,

      Cheers! I hope that the other 999,999 are as good! ;^)

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
    2. I'm not positive, but I think I can hear UK groaning here in Virginia.

      Delete
    3. Chris,

      We’ve had a lot worse to groan about!

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
  15. Hi Bob -
    I was reading about books on my facebook feed, when someone made a comment about what we might consider to be classic (or classical) literature. 'Badly written' was this person'r verdict. Actually, considering the change in literary tastes and styles, I am reluctant to criticise that person's verdict (for some reason I can not fathom, I've never been able to read Dickens, even though I know his to be great stories. It has to do with style, what, I don't know).

    At any rate, I was thinking I had a copy of Herman Hesse 'Steppenwolf' that I bought a zillion years ago and never got around to reading. So I have begun, and am about half way through.

    Peculiar was of beating ennui, I know. Not exactly laugh-a-minute lit... :-D

    Meanwhile I've been drawing up (hand-written in an exercise book) my 'Div Level' WW2 Orbats. Just need to lay them out and take some pictures...
    Cheers,
    Ion

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    Replies
    1. Archduke Piccolo (Ion),

      In my opinion, the problem with so much ‘classic’ literature is to do with the time when it was written. Readers expected books to be long and very detailed, whereas nowadays we expect stories to be told much more succinctly. That’s not to say that modern writers don’t go into detail ... just not as much as those writing in the nineteenth century.

      One example I always cite is LES MISERABLES, which I read some years ago. The part that deals with the Battle of Waterloo is worth reading, but the chapters about the sewers of Paris were more than a little tedious.

      I’ve never read STEPPENWOLF, and I’d be interested to read what you think of it. I suspect that it is one of those books that you’ll be glad that you read ... once you’ve finished it!

      I’m interested to know more about your ORBATs. I’m almost at the stage of being able to start organising the Russian stuff I have renovated.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
    2. I was glad that I had read 'War and Peace' - once I had finished it! I rather think 'Steppenwolf' to be another that I'm not likely to read again. Not, once you pass the 'Treatise on the Steppenwolf' section - some thirty pages - the thing reads well enough.

      The blurb says: "This Faust-like story of the humanization of a middle-aged misanthrope was described in the NY Times as 'a savage indictment of bourgeois society'. But as the author notes in this [Penguin] edition, Steppenwolf is a book that has been violently misunderstood. This self-portrait [it is mainly written, very introspectively, in the first person from the main character, Harry Haller's POV] of a man who felt himself to be half-human and half-wolf [beast] can be seen as a plea for rigorous self-examination and an indictment of intellectual hypocrisy."

      For mine, I also found in it a continual struggle for freedom - in every sense of the word. Apart from the usual 'freedom froms' (e.g. sociopolitical conformism, one's own inhibitions, say) one formed the impression that the dichotomous halves (man/ wolf) seek to escape the constraints placed upon each other by the other half. At that, as the TREATISE section takes forever to lay out, the dichotomy is illusion; Harry is more multifaceted than he has persuaded himself to be.

      Very popular in its day, especially among young people. I think I can see why, but not really my thing.

      I hope I haven't put you off!
      Cheers,
      Ion

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    3. Archduke Piccolo,

      You have rather persuaded me that reading LES MISERABLES was a walk in the park compared to STEPPENWOLF!

      During the lockdown, I’m reading Georges Simenon’s MAIGRET books ... which sound as if they require less effort than STEPPENWOLF ... although they have often been compared with the work of Dostoevsky because of they way they examine the psychology of the victims, the perpetrators, the witnesses, and the detectives.

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete
    4. Character-driven narratives do have a compelling quality of their own, don't they?

      Delete
    5. Archduke Piccolo,

      They certainly do!

      All the best,

      Bob

      Delete

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